Lily Collins, the dazzling star of Emily in Paris, has carved a unique path for herself in Hollywood. Known for her radiant smile and undeniable talent, Lily is also the daughter of one of the most iconic musicians of all time—Phil Collins. While their relationship might seem idyllic on the surface, it has been marked by years of estrangement, misunderstandings, and emotional distance.
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Lily, who has become a household name in recent years, has been vocal about her turbulent relationship with her famous father. Despite Phil’s global fame and success, his role as a father wasn’t without its challenges. After divorcing Lily’s mother, Jill Tavelman, when Lily was just five, physical and emotional distance strained their bond over the years. Here’s everything we know about them!
Lily Collins’ complex childhood
Born to Phil Collins and Jill Tavelman in 1989, Lily enjoyed a few years in a happy united family until her father left when she was 5 years old. Following the split, Lily moved to Los Angeles with her mother, while Phil’s career kept him largely based in the UK and Switzerland. This physical distance created an emotional gap in their relationship, reports Hello Magazine.
In her 2017 memoir, Unfiltered: No Shame, No Regrets, Just Me, Lily opened up about the struggles she faced due to her father’s absence. She wrote:
He may have still been alive, but most of the time it felt as if he were completely gone. I knew he loved me, yet he wasn't physically around to tell me.
Lily’s parents’ divorce left a profound impact on her as a teenager. She has candidly shared how the pain and confusion from her family’s breakup contributed to many emotional and mental challenges in her life. She revealed her struggles with self-esteem and an eating disorder and explained:
Not only did I start viewing myself differently physically, but I began limiting my happiness by controlling my eating habits.
Adding:
Many of my deepest insecurities stem from these issues with my dad.
Lily Collins’ open letter to her father
Like every self-aware individual, Lily consciously made efforts to heal from her past. The result? Her 2017 memoir Unfiltered: No Shame, No Regrets, Just Me. She opened up about the struggles of growing up without a father and longing for his love. The memoir became a significant milestone in her journey towards healing, reports People Magazine.
In the memoir, she wrote an open letter to her father, and in it, she forgave him for not being the father she deserved. Titled ‘A Letter to All Dads,’ the essay is raw, emotional, and deeply reflective. She wrote:
We all make choices and, although I don’t excuse some of yours, at the end of the day, we can’t rewrite the past. I’m learning how to accept your actions and vocalize how they made me feel. I accept and honour the sadness and anger I felt toward the things you did or didn’t do, did or didn’t give me.
I forgive you for not always being there when I needed and for not being the dad I expected. I forgive the mistakes you made.
Lily expressed her desire to move forward, adding:
And although it may seem like it’s too late, it’s not. There’s still so much time to move forward. And I want to. I’m inviting you to join me.
The letter is understood to have been a turning point in Lily and Phil’s relationship. Serving as an olive branch, it helped the father-daughter duo to rebuild their relationship and be a part of each other’s life as grown-up adults.
Lily Collins and Phil Collin: How is their relationship today?
Over the years, Lily and Phil have taken significant steps to mend their relationship, though they live on different continents. Phil, now in his 70s, has retired from performing after health challenges, while Lily continues to rise as a Hollywood star. She often expresses her gratitude for her father’s presence in her life, even if they don’t see each other frequently.
While their relationship may never be picture-perfect, it’s clear they’ve both put in effort to rebuild their bond. Phil has openly expressed his admiration for Lily’s achievements. In a 2016 interview with The Insider, he said:
She just is remarkable. I really believe she can do anything she wants to. Anything she sets her mind to. She's very grounded, knows what she wants to do. She's done it without me. All I said to her was be careful what you say.
Additionally, he has been publicly seen supporting her on many occasions. For instance, he attended the premiere of Emily in Paris, proudly showing his fatherly pride.
On her part, Lily has also been there to support her father. In 2022, she went to the last show of Phil’s Genesis Reunion tour 2022 and called her dad ‘an inspiration’ in a sweet Instagram post later. She wrote:
To have witnessed this last show was truly the memory of a lifetime and an event I shall hold in my heart forever.
Elsewhere also she has shared heartfelt tributes to her dad on social media, celebrating his birthdays with affectionate messages and nostalgic photos.
Earlier this year, she posted a throwback picture of the two skiing together, captioning it:
Whether on a wintery slope adventure or a clear day on Lake Geneva, you were always my ski wingman. Love you to the top of the highest mountain and to the bottom of the deepest wave.
Phil Collins is now preparing for the release of his documentary Drummer First. According to Rayo, the new documentary—which will come out next week—offers a deeper look into the personal and professional life of the man behind hits like ‘In the Air Tonight’ and ‘You’ll Be in My Heart.’
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Sources used:
Hello! Magazine: Emily in Paris star Lily Collins' turbulent relationship with dad Phil Collins explained
People Magazine: All About Lily Collins' Relationship with Parents Phil Collins and Jill Tavelman
Mirror: Phil Collins' famous daughter Lily says 'I forgive you' after childhood heartbreak
Rayo: Phil Collins tells his life story in new documentary called Drummer First
