Despite the prevalence of sex-positive language and behaviour, as well as a growing normalisation of previously outlying sexual activities like BDSM and sex parties, there is one aspect of sex that we believe is still being overlooked and undervalued. Yes, as you suspected, it's foreplay.
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When we think of foreplay, we might picture a 10-minute 'warm up' period before sex. However, excellent foreplay should begin outside of the bedroom so that it has the chance to build up throughout the day, creating a furnace of anticipation for the night's coming activities.
So, here's how to get started long, long before the bedroom even comes to mind!
1. Sexting or Dirty Talk
Our minds are highly susceptible to suggestions, which can be used to our advantage if we're hoping to seduce our partners. Sending erotic messages detailing what they might be in for later that night, or even simply reminding them of what you got up to the night before over breakfast can be an amazingly effective way of exciting and enticing your partner. If you're new to sexting don't be afraid to keep it simple. A teasing comment here, the suggestion of nudity there, is all that is needed to send shivers down their spine.
2. Touch
Touch is the cornerstone of foreplay. A Doctor of Human sexuality, Emily Morse writes, 'one thing is for certain – touch can stimulate the nervous system and help you both get into the mood.' Whilst a long massage session is sure to get you feeling relaxed and sensual, don't wait to enter the bedroom to start touching your partner. Something as simple as a gentle caress while with company, a lingering kiss, or showering together can increase both you and your partner's arousal throughout the day.
3. Try something new
This one isn't necessarily about sex. Studies find that sharing new experiences helps to foster feelings of closeness between couples. And I mean, of course! Who doesn't love seeing their partner in their element? The thrill of making novel and interesting memories with someone else can then be translated into the bedroom, helping you to also see your partner in a new and exciting way.
Sources used:
Sex with Emily: 'How to Practice Foreplay Outside the Bedroom'
GQ: 'The New Foreplay: How To Extend Things Outside The Bedroom'
Glamour: '21 Foreplay Ideas & Tips You’ll Be Dying to Try'
Read more:
⋙ These are the best sofa sex positions for maximum pleasure and comfort
⋙ This sex position brings you closest to your partner so you can reach the height of intimacy
