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Although almost every man manages to finish every time they have sex, women sometimes find it a lot harder to get there. But why? A study carried out by the Institute for Opinion Studies and Marketing in France, also known as Ifop, was published on National Orgasm Day contains a few explanations for this and as you can probably imagine, men are only part of the reason.
The study’s results and figures
This study, carried out among roughly a thousand heterosexual women, revealed some quite troubling figures. For example, in France, where this study was carried out, eight in ten women find it difficult to reach orgasm with their partner, 63% have faked it at least once in their lives and 9% regularly manage to finish. What’s worse still, over the last three months, one in three women in a relationship were found to not have had an orgasm. This figure is relatively high and can be explained by multiple factors.
Phallocentric sexuality
The first factor put forward by Ifop’s study is the fact that women’s orgasms are hindered by phallocentrism, meaning sexual intercourse based around the penetration. The study revealed that only 40% of sexually active French women practice double stimulation (vaginal and clitoral) with their partner. Moreover, sexual ‘fondling’ is only practiced by 42% of women in relationships, and cunnilingus by only 33%. As a result, this shows that men don’t really seem to worry too much about pleasing their partner but instead consider their own personal orgasm to be more important.
Finding what you like so you can orgasm better
According to the study, some men can end up orgasming quite quickly and this could be the complete opposite of what a lot of women need to get excited. Most women need to engage in various aspects of foreplay (touching, nibbling, pinching, licking, playing…) to stimulate the erogenous parts of their body to ultimately allow them to orgasm. It’s also worth mentioning that although 97% of women have experienced an orgasm in their lives, only 37% do so every week and 10% haven’t in over a year.
You need a good understanding of your body
Another contributing factor resides in the fact that women sometimes don’t know their bodies well enough and know what they like or how to make themselves orgasm. The fact that some women don’t have frequent sexual intercourse also doesn’t help with this understanding of their bodies. Therefore, it’s not surprising that women who have sex more than three times a week and who have had more than 10 sexual partners over the course of their lives are more likely to reach orgasm.
Age, experience and self-confidence
However, age is also a factor that needs to be taken into account. The older a woman is, the easier she will find it to orgasm. Apparently, women over the age of 65 managed to orgasm 79% of the time during their last sexual relationship. They not only have better knowledge and understanding of their bodies but they often completely let themselves go because of previous experience and because of how confident they are with their partner. This isn’t always the case for younger couples, since 77% of women said that they like to see their partner orgasm, but 53% said they don’t like their partner watching them finish. This equates to a clear lack of self-confidence among younger people.
Communication helps
Finally, the study also claims that a lack of communication among couples during sex could be preventing a woman from reaching orgasm. According to the study’s results, men should be paying more attention and trying to get a better understanding of the different ways they can please their partner, and women should be encouraging them more and guiding their partners, who sometimes don’t really know how to. Women successfully had more orgasms in 77% of recorded cases in which there was more effectively communicate.
